He sounds like he is doing so awesome! I cant even imagine Sarah being invited to a sleepover for years to come...just a little tweaking and with the help of his super mom and his caring friends he will be just fine:) Very impressed!
I am so used to how Sarah communicates and dont notice her lack of fillers in language till she around others...It seems I prompted all speech out of her for 5 years so now I feel I understand exactly what she means with little context and forget that others dont have a clue...
I am learning to prompt less (sooo hard to do!) and trying to get her to realize others cant read her mind like I do:)
She is getting better but it is so hard for her to understand that we cant read her thoughts and when she has to explain more details she stumbles & gets so frustrated but knows that it is necessary. Poor baby:(
Sometimes we act dumbfounded (over exaggerated) to what the heck she is saying when she just makes statements that we have no clue about...then give her time to come up with what she wants us to know..it is usually an event she saw on TV or at school and she thinks I saw it too or was there...and I just remind her I have no idea what she is saying and she has to tell me the "whole" story for me to understand..she hates this:p ~~ expressive language is still her hardest obstacle I feel.
It would be so much easier if others could just know her little mind all the time but they dont :)
Even though my son does not qualify for speech anymore I can still see communication difficulties. He was invited for a sleep over and when he came back he said to me.."I didn't have my belt" I knew right away what he meant but I then realized that no one else probably would. He was still wearing the pants from the day before because the pants I packed for him didn't have the pulls at the waist and he needed his belt so that they wouldn't fall off. After saying this his friend said, "I told him to just wear the pants he wore yesterday and that it would be ok" WOW. His friend I don't believe has any idea that he is on the spectrum. I mean...he's only 5 just like Adam is. I had to tell his mom when she called and asked if he could sleep over. It's like her son just took the lead you know? It was very sweet but it also made me realize how far behind my son is with communication even if he doesn't qualify for speech anymore. Do any of your children do this? Communicate this way by using a phrase that pertains to the subject but not directly describing the problem? Oh other than that the sleep over went really well and he was really excited. His friend truly seems to really like him too. It was sweet.
Karrie
Yes. My ds does this often. I have to interrupt and tell him that I don't know what he is talking about. And then, he just repeats what he just said. My dd does this once in a while too and it drives me crazy. So, I respond with - Repeating what you just said does not help me understand what you are talking about. You have to tell me MORE, or tell me what happened before, or where was this or when did it happen, etc. (fill in whatever question is appropriate here - I don't say all this, I just pick the one question that is relevant). He then kind of gives me a look like, "Oh yeah." Sometimes I will stop him and say, "Ds, was I there?" And he'll look at me like I'm crazy and say, "No." So, then I say - well, how could I know what you are talking about without you giving me more information? Oh.
This is getting better. I also tell him this is providing CONTEXT or BACKGROUND for the person you are telling the story too. I'm hoping that at some point I will be able to just say to him - I need context for this - and he will get it. Maybe I'm dreaming!
However, one of the 5 year-old twins down the street does this all the time with me. He talks to me a lot - probably because I get him. He's not on the spectrum (well, probably not!) but he has some issues that are similar to ds - so I know exactly how to talk to him and what questions to ask, etc. I'm probably one of the only adults who does this with him, so he's become fairly attached to me...
Yes, the girls do this. They'll give short bits of anecdotes without enough context for anyone other than me or their mother to really understand what they are saying. They are much better when talking about something really concrete - something right in front of them - but when talking about abstract concepts (past, futrue events, feelings, wants, etc), they really do seem to assume way to much contextual knowledge on the part of the listener.I think that story is so cute. It sounds like your son is doing so well. TheSnoop...I agree. My son tested fine in pragmatics though. He has somehow tested fine on their tests yet when it comes to things like this in a more natural setting we are still seeing issues. ?????
Thanks everyone for responding. Makes me feel there are others dealing with this too.
Karrie
my five year old ds does the same thing. He doesn't quite understand the concept of telling us exactly what he needs or why just that he needs it. He was discharged from speech as well because they felt because he is five and is able to say seven word sentence he is appropriate even though he lacks social speech. Glad your little boy is doing so well with sleepovers and friends it sounds like the other kids understand which is fabulous.
WHY are these therapists thinking that speech is just about articulation and being able to talk? PRAGMATICS is a very important part of speech. If they don't have functional and conversational speech - how are they going to function in the world? Our kids don't just "pick things up" from others! That's part of ASD - not "catching on" to what others are doing and imitating them.
Our speech therapists work on social speech all the time in our new district. It drives me crazy that others don't - although I know from personal experience that is the case as our former school district wouldn't. They said they wouldn't even test ds for pragmatics until he was 6 (which was right after we left there - how convenient!) and they didnt' think he'd qualify! Well guess what - he gets social speech in our new district and we're in the same state, so following the same guidelines. GRRRRR.....
As they get older, social speech becomes even more important. WHEN are school districts and therapists going to wake up????!!!!
Branden does this too. I am getting pretty good at figuring out what he wants and what he doesn't want. Branden also likes to say the opposite of what he actually wants, which can get pretty confusing.
Congratulations on the great sleepover and great friendJ does this too. Once in a while, she'll act it out like a mine. She say something like it's pink and you do this (she act it out like a mine). Oh you mean mean the ds right? YAAAAAA! (like I can read her mind)
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